The Juice of What?
by Evil-Queen-Charlotte
Summary: Seventh in my 13 One Shots of Halloween. Lara had an accident one rainy night and soon found herself in a situation with a living girl that she did not like. No one seemed to want to help her till he came along.


7. The Juice of What?

Lara didn't mean to make anyone worry. She was just out in the woods, taking in the nature. Everyone said a big storm was coming but she chose to ignore them and that was what killed her.

She was walking through the woods down a particular steep hill, headed towards home. It had begun to rain and she decided it was time to get back. The rain picked up right as she was on this hill, of course, and soon she lost her footing and slid down the hill falling head over heels. At the bottom she was covered in mud and leaves and probably a few bugs. She groaned and knew her mother was not going to be happy.

Carefully she stood up but her foot that was holding all her weight slipped on a leaf and she fell forward onto a log. Her had met with a branch and it managed to get into her head, killing her instantly.

They found her body after the storm had died out. Her mother and father, even her baby brother, were so upset and heart broken.

Lara watched from the side as they lifted her body into the ambulance and drove off with her. Her father comforted her mother and her little brother cried all night long, almost as if he knew what was going on but how could he, he was only two years old.

With no where else to go, Lara returned to her room and sat down on her bed and sighed. What now? Wasn't she suppose to go to heaven or something. She was only seventeen and was always a good girl so she couldn't go to hell. Was this purgatory? She wasn't religious but this was all she had to go on since no one else had shared ideas as to what happened after you died. Unless…

"Am I a ghost?" she asked. Then questions of unfinished business came into her head and she tried to figure out what it could be. "I was 17 for Pete's sake, of course I had unfinished business. I even had unfinished homework." She glanced at it. "What the heck." She sat at her desk and began to do her homework. At least when her parents come in they can have the satisfaction of knowing she finished her homework before she went into the woods.

When she finished she smiled at a job well done then looked over her desk. That's when she saw it. It was a book she had never seen before.

"The Handbook for the Recently Deceased," she said then flipped it open to the first page and began to read. As the boring words drone on and on she ended up falling asleep.

She was woken up in the morning by her door opening. She looked around and saw her room was bare of all her things and her parents weren't alone in the room. There was a girl there, about fourteen or so, and she had a suitcase.

"Who the hell is she?" Lara asked getting up.

"I hope like your new room Laura," said her mother.

"It is wonderful, thank you, May," she said smiling at Lara's mum.

"Oh, no, you call me mum," said Lara's mother.

"No she can't. Who is she? You're my mother!" shouted Lara at her mother who ignored her. Of course she did, she didn't hear anything.

"Well get settled in, then we can take you to town. We have the best ice cream shop in the city," said her father.

"Sounds great," said Laura.

"No it doesn't! I want ice cream! There has to be something in this about how to talk to the living," she said and angrily flipped through the book. Her parents left the room and this 'Laura' began to unpack her things and place them around Lara's room.

Lara, upset with the book, chucked it across the room and grabbed her hair. She had only died yesterday, how could her parents get rid of her stuff and replace her over night? Something was not right here. Lara began to look for a calendar and soon found one in her brother's room. A date was circled and it said 'Laura comes'. That day was ten months after she had died.

She marched back into her room and tried to put Laura's stuff back into the suitcase but she couldn't pick anything up, her hands just went right through it.

"I thought I was a ghost," she said and grabbed the Handbook and flipped through it. Laura finished unpacking and left the room. Lara glared at her as she left and then went back to the book.

"Oh here, 'draw a door,'" she read. She grabbed a pen next to her and went to the wall. She drew a door. "What now? 'Knock three times.'" She knocked and soon the door opened and she went into a waiting room where there were other people who looked like they were in a tragic accident themselves sitting there. She walked up to the front desk and knocked on the closed window. It opened and an ex-beauty queen looked at her.

"Yes? How can I help you?" she asked.

"I'm not quite sure. I was just looking in this book for a way to communicate with the living and the only things it told me was to draw a door. Which I did and it put me here," she said and looked around some more.

"You wish to communicate with the living, why?" asked the beauty queen laughing, a few in the waiting room laughed as well.

"Well my parents have seemed to have replaced me and I want her gone," explained Lara glaring at the man who had a tire track across his NASCAR shirt that he was wearing who had been laughing at her.

"You can have a meeting with your case worker but you'll be using them all up," explained the beauty queen.

"How many meetings do I have?"

"Since you are a minor you get four meetings within the hundred year period you have to spend on earth."

"One hundred years? Do all dead people have to go through that?"

"No, it all depends on how they die. People who die in accident have to spend one hundred years here."

"Okay, and can my case worker help me?"

"Depends on your case worker. Take a number and then go ahead and wait."

"Thanks," she said glumly and grabbed a number from the dispenser. 7898. Lara glanced up at what number they were on. 47. She sighed and took a seat in the recliner and waited what felt like was a century, what only was about an hour.

"Lara?" asked a guy who looked more like road kill than the NASCAR fan. Lara got up and followed him. He lead her through an office where many skeletons were working.

"I thought people looked the way they did when they died. How are their so many skeletons?"

"Victims up nuclear war. We don't like to talk about it."

Lara 'oh'ed and followed along to an office. She was told to wait inside and that's what she did until a short little guy wearing a circus ringmaster outfit came in. It looked like he wasn't always so short either.

"So you're the minor huh?" he asked looking through a file then up at her.

"Yes," she said shrugging her shoulders.

"I'm Fred, your case worker. Well what can I do for you today?" he asked leaning on his hand that was propped up on his desk as if he a child about to be told the best story in the world.

"I want to be able to communicate with the living," she said.

"Oh, that's easy. Ouiji board. Give me another one, that was too easy."

"I can't seem to pick up anything."

"Yes you can, just not while the living are in the room."

"Wait, can I arrange things when they aren't in the room and they can walk into the room and find it the way I arranged it?"

Fred smiled almost as if to say 'yes' and Lara got excited.

"Nope," he said still smiling.

"Then why did you smile?"

"Because you looked to excited, it must have rubbed off on me. No what you need to do is read your Handbook on hauntings."

"Where would that be? I've tried to read this handbook and look for a place on hauntings but I can't. And it doesn't help that it reads like stereo instructions."

"It's there, somewhere. Or at least I'm told. Now I have meeting to get too. Nice to meet you, minor."

"Wait, you didn't help me all you told me to do was read a book!" Fred ignored her and left the office. Lara sighed and left as well trying to find a way back home.

She was walking in a hallway that had many doors down it. Doors of all shapes and sizes and the floor seemed to have rolling hills to them. She would look into the doors to see if she could make out something familiar. She was looking in one door when a guy came up to her.

"Hey," he said in a whisper.

"Hi," she said nodding to him and then moving to the next door.

"You need some help?"

"Uh, I'm good," said Lara checking the next door.

"Take this," he said and handed her a flier. She looked at it then back up but the guy was gone.

" 'Do you have problems with the living? Want to get rid of some pests? Then call Beetlejuice…' the juice of what? That's gross, why would I want beetlejuice?" she was about to chuck the flier but then the first line stood out to her, "okay what else is there to this Beetljuice?"

All of a sudden she felt a vacuum sensation and soon found herself back in the woods where she died. On top of the log that killed was a man. His face looked like it was rotting and he had wisps of green hair. He was also wearing a black and white striped suit.

"How did I get here?" Lara asked herself.

"Because of me. Welcome to your human help hotline, how can I be of service?" asked the guy. She gave him a weird look and observed the ground, it was firm and dry.

"Who are you?" she asked looking at him again.

"You," he paused giving her a bewildered look, "don't know?"

"No. As far as I know you're just a crazy guy sitting on a log in the middle of the woods."

"You didn't read the flier?"

"I did, it was about Beetlejuice," she said, "why did you want me to bring you some?"

"Some what?" he asked.

"Beetlejuice," she said.

"What? I am Beetlejuice," he said. Lara's eyes went wide and then she looked kind of embarrassed.

"Oh! I thought it was an advertisement for a drink or something. Like a magic potion that would help get rid of the living." Beetlejuice jumped down from off the log and walked over to her.

"Nope, no potion. But I can help with the living problem," he said and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, "tell me what I can do for you."

"Get rid of this new girl my parents got to replace me," she said.

"That's it?" he asked offended by the task.

"Yes," she said, "and my parents and brother are to be left out of this."

"Okay, I don't usually do things so simple but I will make an exception for you. So now let's talk about payment."

"Well I'm a dead minor so really I have no money," she said.

"Of course, money is useless here anyhow," he said.

"Then what do you want?"

"A way out. I've been doing grunt work for a caseworker for some time and if I can make a name for myself I can be a huge hit. All I need you to do it get the word out about me. Take these fliers," he pulled a huge stack out of his coat pocket, "and slip them into the handbooks."

"Where do I find the handbooks?"

"You'll have to sneak into the factory, it's just right there," he said and pointed ahead of them where a huge factory was.

"That's all? And Laura will be gone?" she asked.

"Yes," he said with a sinister smile. Lara took the fliers and walked towards the factory.

"Sucker," he said and disappeared.

Lara found it quite easy to get into the factory and headed over to where they finished books were. As they came down the line she slipped a flier into each one and then left the factory. She walked about five minutes till she saw her house come into view. She walked inside and saw that Laura was gone, but so were her parents. The whole house was empty. She was confused. She walked back outside and saw that there was nothing. No birds, or people or cars.

Then she heard a loud laughter and looked up and saw giant Beetlejuice looking down at her from up in the sky.

"What's going on?" she yelled up to him.

"Sorry, kid, I had to get out, you were gullible enough to get in," he said laughing.

"Get in where?"

"The model where I was trapped," he said. He pulled out a mirror and fixed his hair before turning back to her, "now if you don't mind I have some business to attend to." And he left the room.

Lara looked around her and noticed that everything was just like it would be in a model. It was her town but no one was there except her.

"Trapped. Great," she said and sat down on her porch steps and began to read her handbook that she still had. What else was there to do?

A/n: I would just like to say that today is my mum's birthday, so happy birthday to her. I like this story. I wanted Beetljuice to seem a bit sane since this is the beginning of his reign of terror. Thank you reading and pleas review and check out my profile to see what story I will be posting tomorrow.


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